Day 10 of 31: The Perfect Woman? (Some Thoughts on Proverbs 31)

            About a year or so ago, my brother said that he felt God told him that I am a Proverbs 31 woman.  My first reaction was, “Uh, why?” 

            I hate to tell you this, but I confess I would have rather been called anything besides a Proverbs 31 woman.  And I know that is terrible because that should be a compliment.  But to me, that sounds a little too churchy because so many Christians have looked to Proverbs 31 as the formula for the perfect woman.  Somehow I never thought it was supposed to be that formula.

            The woman described in Proverbs 31 sounds like she is the ideal woman who is perfectly disciplined—but maybe doesn’t have a lot of personality and never oversleeps.  I wanted to be a little more free and fun and easygoing than that (since I oversleep often).  But the more I look into these verses, the more I see the passage is not excluding personality or fun or actual feeling.  For example…

• ·      “Her clothing is fine linen and purple” (Proverbs 31:22). I’ve heard people say this is because she worked hard and was confident to wear the color of royalty, which is probably true.  But maybe she also just had a spunky taste in clothes and really liked to wear bright, fun colors like purple.
• ·      “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come” (Proverbs 31:25).  She does not live worrying about tomorrow, but she can make jokes and laugh and enjoy today.
• ·      “She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy” (Proverbs 31:20). She is not a robotic maid or a porcelain doll; she is a warm-blooded gal with a big heart who gives and serves those she has compassion on.
• ·      “She…provides portions for her maidservants” (Proverbs 31:15).  She treats everyone she works with and encounters on a daily basis with respect and care.  She’s not trying to be perfect; she’s just treating others the way she wants to be treated.

My college friend Katie drew this for me based on Proverbs 31:16. Thank you, Katie!! 

            My brother told me that he thinks God called me a Proverbs 31 woman because I lived out Proverbs 31:16:  “She considers a field and buys it.” This was the verse that finally convinced me that God was leading me to buy land.  I didn’t anticipate that this verse was in Proverbs 31 because it doesn’t seem particularly feminine or spiritual.  But I know from experience, considering a field and buying it does take courage.  So maybe the Proverbs 31 woman isn’t boring or predictable; maybe she is courageous and willing to deviate from the course people would have expected her to take.

           

            A few weeks ago, I read an article by Donald Miller.  In his article, he asks, “Do you think your story matters less because you’re a woman?”[1]  Unfortunately, I’d have to say that yes, I did think this at one point in my life.  But there is nothing in me that thinks this anymore.

            Last week I came across Propel Women, which is an organization started by Christine Caine.  In their online magazine, I read the following description of the kind of women that team wants to be.[2]

Unashamed: She does not minimize or hide who God has made her.

Unstoppable: She follows the call of God.

Unlimited: Her potential in Christ is limitless.

Untamable: She is dangerous to the kingdom of darkness.

Unapologetic: She is a woman who leads.

Unleashed: She is not held captive to old paradigms or stereotypes.

Undefeatable: She knows no weapon formed against her shall prosper.

Unselfish: She is generous with her words, thoughts, resources, and relationships.

Unpretentious: She is real, down to earth, and accessible.

Unshakable: She is rooted and grounded in the love and grace of God.

Unstuck: She moves gracefully from one season to the next.

Unmovable: She will not be manipulated.

Uncommon:  She is not chasing worldly success, fame, or fortune.

Undone: by the love, grace, goodness, kindness and mercy of God.

I was inspired as I read this description. As a woman, I need this encouragement.

           I’m finding that the description of the woman in the Proverbs 31 is not supposed to be the formula of a perfect women--what we should do and how we should behave and what time we should wake up; rather, it is just describing to us how women make a difference in this world day in and day out.  Sure, it's great to follow the example described for us and to meditate on these verses.  But we should also consider that in Proverbs 31, I believe God is saying to us, “I see the unselfish things you do on a daily basis. It’s making a bigger impact than you can see.  But you, my daughter, are worth far more than rubies.” #seeingtheunseen

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[1] Miller, Donald. http://storylineblog.com/2014/08/27/do-you-think-your-story-matters-less-because-youre-a-woman/?utm_content=buffera5fcc&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer.

[2] http://propelwomen.org/